The Last Werewolf
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"If, then...If, then...This, aside from the business of monthly transformation, the inestimable drag of Being a Werewolf, is what I'm sick of, the endless logistics. There's a reason humans peg-out around eighty: prose fatigue. It looks like organ failure or cancer or stroke but it's really just the inability to carry on clambering through the assault course of mundane cause and effect....Four score years is about all the ifs and thens you can take. Dementia's the sane realisation you just can't be doing with all that anymore." (p. 9) "The greatest gift of lycanthropy is knowing smoking won't kill you." (p. 154) "To tell you the truth I can't remember much about 1850. Dickens published David Copperfield. Wordsworth died. I'll have to think." (p. 187) "The Western world's so mad these days you can put an ad in the paper and some desperate self-harmer will answer it. Wanted: Victim for werewolf. Must be plump and juicy. Non-smoker with GSOH preferred. No time-wasters." (p. 207)